A FAMILY BUSINESS AT SIXES AND 007s
This little theatre has given us some strong meat lately – themes of Nazi crimes, Jewishness, Russianness – but this time it hosts the Barn theatre’s sparky, short and cheeky take by Jordan Waller on the James Bond franchise, directed by Derek Bond, no relation.. It comes just at a lovely topical moment since – as per the play itself – the new Bond hovers unnamed in the near future. It is a fine romp, coming in under two hours including interval, invites us to have a few thoughts about toxic masculinity, race and ingenerational misunderstanding.
It is fuelled by a manically enjoyable performance by Tanya Franks as the imagined heiress of the Bond francise, a responsibility she holds jointly with her cousin Malcolm (Phlip Bretherton), white-haired and cautious. She also fancies raising her son the intern to producer level, and presentis him with the vintage Rolex Submariner worn by Connery in the first film. But Quinn (Harry Goodson-Bevan) is more interested in making a film in Sierra LEone with his hip boyfriend. So as far as human relations go (which is nowhere very deep) it is about a powerful woman’s conflicted feelings for both her father and her son, all tangled up with everyone’s feelings for James Bond.
It’s all punctuated by odd blasts of Bond music and once even some smoke, and is at its best when joyfully cartoonish: Deborah on the phone snapping at scriptwriters “We love the schooldchilrenm we love the monks, but needs a twist”, discussing the blowing up of a giant Buddha and emphasising that it’s for the boys “for god’s sake, he’s a MAN they need a MAN to make sense of the world we live in”. And as for a costume detail “He’s not wearing high-vis! He’s James Bond, not a f–ing bin lady!”.
They have 24 hours before the announcement of the new Bond, but of course as Malcolm and Quinn nip in and out it becomes clear that “David” won’t do . Phone messages. To girls. Young girls. Kaput!. They agonize over audition tapes, one being blandly Bondish and obvious “Caucasian male six foot, dark hair” but Quinn says his friend, a resting-actor barman, sent oene in and they all look. And it’s Theo (Obioma Ugoala) and he’s good. But he’s also brown. Dare they? Might this open the door to more frighteningly diverse Bonds, identifying all over the place with “mental health and feelings… Angela Merkel in an avocado suit..”) . Deborah at one point roars “TOxic men. Of cours’e he’s toxic, he’s a f—ing bastard and thats what makes him a MAN!
Well, of course they dare. A bit. But then THeo turns out to be vegetarian as well, and that’s not all. There’s more. He may not even be happy with exploding the Buddha, and nor is Gen-Z Quinn. Panic rises. A small betrayal looms. More pastiche music and hysteria. A snap ending. Well, the journey has been fun , but it hasn’t quite led anywhere . Still, there’s a place for that, in August.
marylebonetheatre.com to 30 Aug
RATING 3
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